"Long Distance Relationships - How to Make it Work?"
My Dear Lover,
Today I want to share with you the an article of Rachelle Arlin
Credo, about
"Long Distance Relationships - How to Make it Work"
~~~~~~~~~ Begin of article ~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Long Distance Relationships - How to Make it Work
By Rachelle Arlin Credo
Long distance relationships are dreadful. I know this because I'm
currently living one. You watch other couples walk down the street
hand-in-hand, kissing, etc., everyday and you can't do anything but
envy them. So how can a long distance relationship work? How can
you keep on loving someone if you can't even see them?
The answer is...it depends on how much you want it to work. True
love can overcome any odds thrown in its path if you want it bad
enough. So the question is, how do you do it? Well, I do not think
that anyone knows exactly how to make it work, but I can certainly
provide some points on making it work.
1. COMMUNICATION is the key.
In every relationship, whether near or far, if communication is
taken for granted, it can cause the relationship to quiver until it
eventually dies a natural death. That's why in any given
circumstance, communication has to be given utmost importance.
There are so many available media to ensure that the communication
stays open. From snail mails and phone calls to chat systems and
e-mails or e-cards. These media can be effective means to convey
your hearts desires to your loved ones. Let them know about what
you've been doing and thinking because in that way they will feel
like they are there with you. This will also help you feel close
even though you are miles apart.
2. Send off CARE PACKAGES.
It can be anything -- a little gift of flowers; a collection of the
letters he has sent you designed artistically into a scrapbook; or
your sweetheart's favorite jewelry -- it's really only limited to
your imagination. Engaging yourself in this way is beneficial for
both of you. You get to concentrate on gathering these items and
putting them together, thus keeping your mind off not being
together to a certain extent. Your loved one will see how much
effort you put into it and how much you care. Even if it is nothing
more than a card,it shows they mean enough to you that you can take
the time to let them know. It never takes much money to show a
little love with a small gift. Trust me, it can melt a heart!
3. Keep yourself BUSY.
You couldn't just sit there and wait 'til he comes back to you.
What if he doesn't come back at all and all you did was sit and get
your tummy flabby, won't that make you just miserable? You won't
just be stunting your growth as an individual in the process but
you'd also be developing emotional insecurities. In order to avoid
that, you have to focus yourself on other things while waiting. Try
to identify your passions. Get in touch with your creative nature.
If you are a homebody, you can read tons of books which can help
you grow intellectually and emotionally or you can choose to lounge
before your computer and surf for hours to learn invaluable things
over the internet. It's an endless "ways-to-make-yourself-busy"
list and it is up to you to decide whichever you're interested to
get involved in. But remember, being "busy" is not an excuse to
forget your "special days" and worse yet, your loved one. You're
doing it not just to occupy yourself but also to allow yourself to
grow even with your lover's absence.
4. HONESTY is the best policy.
The path to true intimacy and connection especially in a long
distance relationship is through "total honesty" to each other in
the fullest sense of the words. By being authentic and telling your
full truth to your loved one about your thoughts, feelings, needs,
wants, issues, boundaries, etc., you are gradually building up a
zone of confidence and comfort for both of you. This is very
essential if you want your relationship to really last. Seeking to
avoid conflict and maintain harmony by censoring yourself can work
for a while but it won't take much time until your suppressed truth
comes out in other ways, such as withdrawal, resentment, "acting
out," etc. I know, sometimes, telling your whole truth can be
difficult and even scary, but it will result in the kind of
relationship that you really want-- a relationship where all the
cards are laid in the table.
5. The value of TRUST
Trust is a very fundamental aspect in any relationship. That is
because having trust in a relationship takes away doubt. When you
trust someone you never have to question their motivation about
anything and with mutual trust that relationship is solid. You must
learn to be true to the relationship and must never give way to
insecurities, strange feelings, suspicions and quick impulses
because these will only bring your relationship down. Don't push
away negative comments, or advice. Just trust in yourself and your
partner. If you two are true to each other and have no hidden
motives then you'll be alright. Remember "Love never fails."
6. COMMITMENT is a habit not an achievement
In every relationship, it is a must to be able to learn how to
commit and be committed. For most long distance relationships, the
very reason why they fail is because both parties couldn't go on
with the commitment and they feel too weak to withstand the
tribulations of time.If you have committed yourselves to each other
without shilly-shallying, then you have a good promise ahead of
you.Your comitment to each other will keep the passion alive and
the fires burning thus sustaining the growth of the relationship.
7. PATIENCE is a virtue.
Being in a long distance relationship requires being steadfast and
persevering. If you aren't this kind of person and you're involved
in a long distance relationship, then as much as now, you better
try to learn to be patient. Focus your attention on all the
positive aspects of the relationship and never give your hopes up.
Showing that you value your partner and the relationship and that
you are willing to work patiently through it will let them know you
truly love them.
8. WEBCAM
This is applicable only for those who have the comfort of having
their own personal computers at home.But for those who don't, there
are computers-for-rent in cafe's with webcams already attached to
the computer system. Having a webcam is actually very fun and
exciting. Even if you aren't together but looking at each other's
face in the broad screen makes you feel like you're just so close,
so near to your loved one. My boyfriend and I use Yahoo messenger
to express our emotions with smileys and it's melting my heart to
see him smile in the cam when he gets my messages.
9. Make special occasions SPECIAL.
It is not everyday that a special day comes so when it does, it
must be celebrated no matter how far apart you are. When I speak of
special occasions, I mean birthdays, anniversaries, Christmas, New
Year and Valentine's Day. During these occasions, you can plan out
some heavy-duty phone call or an extended online time for the
evening. Regardless of whether you talk every night or a couple
times a week, be sure you both carve out some time for that
particular night. If you're too stingy to settle on a lengthy phone
call, but have cheap and unlimited online access, plan to send
instant messages to each other or meet in a private chatroom
somewhere. If you can't be together, at least you can be "talking"
and "spending some private moments together".
10. ENJOY LIFE!
Not because your loved one is away, it doesn't mean that your
"life" is taken away with him as he sets on for greener pastures.
You have your own life to live and you must live it up to the
purpose you were created for, with or without your loved
one.Anyway, we have our family and friends. What are these social
beings surrounding us created for anyway?
Remember,there are definite hardships associated with this
relationship style but it is important that those who thrive in a
long distance relationship see the suffering, difficulties,
distance and time as tools in cultivating their love and rearing up
the maturity in their relationship. The best you can do is to
strive to be the best of who you are as a person while your partner
is away so that when he comes back to you, you are already a
full-grown individual whom he will love even more and be more proud
of more than ever! For now, just be happy in knowing that across
the miles there is someone who thinks you are so special, they are
willing to engage in a terrible thing such as a long distance
relationship. Keep in mind that your suffering is not forever since
your loved one will be back soon and when that time comes,
everything will be much sweeter than it was back then.
Rachelle Arlin Credo (c) 2005
Rachelle Arlin Credo is an entrepreneur and relationship coach. She
also works as an image consultant and part-time writer. Formerly a
contributing scribe to The Freeman and Sunstar Daily - Philippines,
she writes short stories, poems, essays, and tons of articles for
Writers.net, Netterweb.com, Ideamarketers.com, Searchwarp.com, and
Goarticles.com. For more info, mailto: raeshylle@yahoo.com.
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/
~~~~~~~~~ End of article ~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Why I share this article with you?
Because I want you know, that isn't only me that believe that Long
Distance Relationship can relay work.
Don't measure the distance, measure the Love, Maria Madeira.
Today I want to share with you the an article of Rachelle Arlin
Credo, about
"Long Distance Relationships - How to Make it Work"
~~~~~~~~~ Begin of article ~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Long Distance Relationships - How to Make it Work
By Rachelle Arlin Credo
Long distance relationships are dreadful. I know this because I'm
currently living one. You watch other couples walk down the street
hand-in-hand, kissing, etc., everyday and you can't do anything but
envy them. So how can a long distance relationship work? How can
you keep on loving someone if you can't even see them?
The answer is...it depends on how much you want it to work. True
love can overcome any odds thrown in its path if you want it bad
enough. So the question is, how do you do it? Well, I do not think
that anyone knows exactly how to make it work, but I can certainly
provide some points on making it work.
1. COMMUNICATION is the key.
In every relationship, whether near or far, if communication is
taken for granted, it can cause the relationship to quiver until it
eventually dies a natural death. That's why in any given
circumstance, communication has to be given utmost importance.
There are so many available media to ensure that the communication
stays open. From snail mails and phone calls to chat systems and
e-mails or e-cards. These media can be effective means to convey
your hearts desires to your loved ones. Let them know about what
you've been doing and thinking because in that way they will feel
like they are there with you. This will also help you feel close
even though you are miles apart.
2. Send off CARE PACKAGES.
It can be anything -- a little gift of flowers; a collection of the
letters he has sent you designed artistically into a scrapbook; or
your sweetheart's favorite jewelry -- it's really only limited to
your imagination. Engaging yourself in this way is beneficial for
both of you. You get to concentrate on gathering these items and
putting them together, thus keeping your mind off not being
together to a certain extent. Your loved one will see how much
effort you put into it and how much you care. Even if it is nothing
more than a card,it shows they mean enough to you that you can take
the time to let them know. It never takes much money to show a
little love with a small gift. Trust me, it can melt a heart!
3. Keep yourself BUSY.
You couldn't just sit there and wait 'til he comes back to you.
What if he doesn't come back at all and all you did was sit and get
your tummy flabby, won't that make you just miserable? You won't
just be stunting your growth as an individual in the process but
you'd also be developing emotional insecurities. In order to avoid
that, you have to focus yourself on other things while waiting. Try
to identify your passions. Get in touch with your creative nature.
If you are a homebody, you can read tons of books which can help
you grow intellectually and emotionally or you can choose to lounge
before your computer and surf for hours to learn invaluable things
over the internet. It's an endless "ways-to-make-yourself-busy"
list and it is up to you to decide whichever you're interested to
get involved in. But remember, being "busy" is not an excuse to
forget your "special days" and worse yet, your loved one. You're
doing it not just to occupy yourself but also to allow yourself to
grow even with your lover's absence.
4. HONESTY is the best policy.
The path to true intimacy and connection especially in a long
distance relationship is through "total honesty" to each other in
the fullest sense of the words. By being authentic and telling your
full truth to your loved one about your thoughts, feelings, needs,
wants, issues, boundaries, etc., you are gradually building up a
zone of confidence and comfort for both of you. This is very
essential if you want your relationship to really last. Seeking to
avoid conflict and maintain harmony by censoring yourself can work
for a while but it won't take much time until your suppressed truth
comes out in other ways, such as withdrawal, resentment, "acting
out," etc. I know, sometimes, telling your whole truth can be
difficult and even scary, but it will result in the kind of
relationship that you really want-- a relationship where all the
cards are laid in the table.
5. The value of TRUST
Trust is a very fundamental aspect in any relationship. That is
because having trust in a relationship takes away doubt. When you
trust someone you never have to question their motivation about
anything and with mutual trust that relationship is solid. You must
learn to be true to the relationship and must never give way to
insecurities, strange feelings, suspicions and quick impulses
because these will only bring your relationship down. Don't push
away negative comments, or advice. Just trust in yourself and your
partner. If you two are true to each other and have no hidden
motives then you'll be alright. Remember "Love never fails."
6. COMMITMENT is a habit not an achievement
In every relationship, it is a must to be able to learn how to
commit and be committed. For most long distance relationships, the
very reason why they fail is because both parties couldn't go on
with the commitment and they feel too weak to withstand the
tribulations of time.If you have committed yourselves to each other
without shilly-shallying, then you have a good promise ahead of
you.Your comitment to each other will keep the passion alive and
the fires burning thus sustaining the growth of the relationship.
7. PATIENCE is a virtue.
Being in a long distance relationship requires being steadfast and
persevering. If you aren't this kind of person and you're involved
in a long distance relationship, then as much as now, you better
try to learn to be patient. Focus your attention on all the
positive aspects of the relationship and never give your hopes up.
Showing that you value your partner and the relationship and that
you are willing to work patiently through it will let them know you
truly love them.
8. WEBCAM
This is applicable only for those who have the comfort of having
their own personal computers at home.But for those who don't, there
are computers-for-rent in cafe's with webcams already attached to
the computer system. Having a webcam is actually very fun and
exciting. Even if you aren't together but looking at each other's
face in the broad screen makes you feel like you're just so close,
so near to your loved one. My boyfriend and I use Yahoo messenger
to express our emotions with smileys and it's melting my heart to
see him smile in the cam when he gets my messages.
9. Make special occasions SPECIAL.
It is not everyday that a special day comes so when it does, it
must be celebrated no matter how far apart you are. When I speak of
special occasions, I mean birthdays, anniversaries, Christmas, New
Year and Valentine's Day. During these occasions, you can plan out
some heavy-duty phone call or an extended online time for the
evening. Regardless of whether you talk every night or a couple
times a week, be sure you both carve out some time for that
particular night. If you're too stingy to settle on a lengthy phone
call, but have cheap and unlimited online access, plan to send
instant messages to each other or meet in a private chatroom
somewhere. If you can't be together, at least you can be "talking"
and "spending some private moments together".
10. ENJOY LIFE!
Not because your loved one is away, it doesn't mean that your
"life" is taken away with him as he sets on for greener pastures.
You have your own life to live and you must live it up to the
purpose you were created for, with or without your loved
one.Anyway, we have our family and friends. What are these social
beings surrounding us created for anyway?
Remember,there are definite hardships associated with this
relationship style but it is important that those who thrive in a
long distance relationship see the suffering, difficulties,
distance and time as tools in cultivating their love and rearing up
the maturity in their relationship. The best you can do is to
strive to be the best of who you are as a person while your partner
is away so that when he comes back to you, you are already a
full-grown individual whom he will love even more and be more proud
of more than ever! For now, just be happy in knowing that across
the miles there is someone who thinks you are so special, they are
willing to engage in a terrible thing such as a long distance
relationship. Keep in mind that your suffering is not forever since
your loved one will be back soon and when that time comes,
everything will be much sweeter than it was back then.
Rachelle Arlin Credo (c) 2005
Rachelle Arlin Credo is an entrepreneur and relationship coach. She
also works as an image consultant and part-time writer. Formerly a
contributing scribe to The Freeman and Sunstar Daily - Philippines,
she writes short stories, poems, essays, and tons of articles for
Writers.net, Netterweb.com, Ideamarketers.com, Searchwarp.com, and
Goarticles.com. For more info, mailto: raeshylle@yahoo.com.
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/
~~~~~~~~~ End of article ~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Why I share this article with you?
Because I want you know, that isn't only me that believe that Long
Distance Relationship can relay work.
Don't measure the distance, measure the Love, Maria Madeira.
,
2 Comments:
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At 1:26 AM, Anonymous said…
Nothing is impossible when true love dictates a relationship. In recent years, there has been a great deal of issue with long distance relationships. With communication developing, such concept is not anymore a problem. However, a lot are still doubting on the reality that long distance relationships are possible. Though tough to handle, such thing is always a simple thing to do.
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